That's my theme for this blog entry, m'dears. "Sometimes, good things fall apart, so better things can fall together."
At some point in time this has meant something to someone. Whether it is a romantic relationship, a friendship, or not even a relationship at all.
My good friend Stephanie got broken up with by her boyfriend from where she lived before she moved to Chicago. She was heartbroken, trying to convince him that what he had with this new girl was nothing compared to what he had with her. She kept a strong face, although she was hurt by it. But lo and behold, I log onto facebook today to find out she's with someone who, by a LONG shot, is far better for her than her ex ever could be. Stephanie and Ayden, if either one of you read this, this is my hope for the best for the two of you. My Jew self would say Mazel Tov.
My sister-in-law Holly is another shining example. She went through a tough relationship, being both physically and emotionally abused by her ex. Yet she dragged herself away from it with a baby in tow, only to find my brother who is now Dad to that young boy, and her knight in shining armor.
I'm even a decent example. I had what I thought was the best relationship in the world with my ex, Shawn. I loved him, and to this day I still do a little bit, that will never change. But I realized between the two of us, we just were not good together. We brought the worst out in each other. And that lead me to where I am today, trying to better myself and make myself happy.
So here's my theme for you today, kiddies. If you're someone in a damaging relationship, reeling from a break up, or simply can't find yourself...don't give up. While it may seem that perfect part of your life is in shatters now, you will put it together in a way that is far more beautiful than it was before. Always Remember: sometimes, good things fall apart so better things can come together.
I love you all! Expect a video blog sometime in the future!!
I'll see you another time, all of my little lovelies! Have a great day!
The Littlest One
**What I'm Listening To:
Dedicated to Shawn Forbes**
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Monday, July 11, 2011
To My Brother DAVID...
Dear David,
This is what I wanted to say at your baby shower, but couldn't manage around all of the people (and beer.) This is for you (and Justina and Miss Emma), but mostly you.
Here goes.
If someone asked me a year ago, I would have told them "no, I've never been close to my oldest brother--just JJ, Danny and Travis." You had a mixed-up life going into your adult years, and it was so difficult for me to understand why you couldn't always be there. It never occurred to me that your life might have been in shards that you needed to pick up and glue back together. Over the years as I grew into the woman I was to become, a disgusting feeling of hate and distaste welled within me. I refused to tell anyone that I even had a third brother. Gently, my wonderful mother urged me into forgiveness. But, just like you, I had a will of iron and refused to see it any other way. The day of my sweet sixteen, you didn't show up. You had to work, but that was something that, at the time, I could simply not understand. At eighteen, I refused to look your way at my birthday party.
At my graduation party, you once more showed up, almost sheepish and quiet, as if unsure how to act around me. Trailing behind you was the ever-brilliant woman who is now the mother of your children, who will someday (hopefully soon) become your wife. I felt my walls began to break down; still, I remained adamant upon my anger and feelings of betrayal.
Some time ago, you came to me and told me that you would be a father. With a hateful smirk I began to think horrid things that, to this day, I am still very, very ashamed of. But then there was Emma. I saw that sweet little smile and the bigger one you toted when she gazed up at you in admiration. And then you came to work for Mom, and we spoke more and more often. I came to the realization that without having known you much during my growing up, I had become eerily like you.
And then was yesterday. I watched an old home movie of us down at the Port of Oquwaka. How you chased after me, tucked my shirt in, buttoned my loose overall and even tied my shoes. How you laughed when I did goofy things common to a child of my age group. And I realized my own grin of admiration at that age much mirrored Emma's--and that smile you returned mirrored the one you flash at that little girl today.
David, There is absolutely zero doubt in my mind that you will be an amazing father. It took us such a long time to be brother and sister, but on this day (just any old normal Monday) I am happy we took the path we did. I have a unique relationship with you that I do not share with anyone else in this family. It is a bond of love and respect, as I realize how hard this bond was to build, and how much harder it will be to break. You have been one of my worst enemies, and now you are one of my best friends. The admiration I feel for you in my heart has become so much more than it did that day down by the river when I was two.
I love you, and I hope for you, Justina, and Emma the very best. I will always be there to celebrate at your side.
Much love, Your sister.
This is what I wanted to say at your baby shower, but couldn't manage around all of the people (and beer.) This is for you (and Justina and Miss Emma), but mostly you.
Here goes.
If someone asked me a year ago, I would have told them "no, I've never been close to my oldest brother--just JJ, Danny and Travis." You had a mixed-up life going into your adult years, and it was so difficult for me to understand why you couldn't always be there. It never occurred to me that your life might have been in shards that you needed to pick up and glue back together. Over the years as I grew into the woman I was to become, a disgusting feeling of hate and distaste welled within me. I refused to tell anyone that I even had a third brother. Gently, my wonderful mother urged me into forgiveness. But, just like you, I had a will of iron and refused to see it any other way. The day of my sweet sixteen, you didn't show up. You had to work, but that was something that, at the time, I could simply not understand. At eighteen, I refused to look your way at my birthday party.
At my graduation party, you once more showed up, almost sheepish and quiet, as if unsure how to act around me. Trailing behind you was the ever-brilliant woman who is now the mother of your children, who will someday (hopefully soon) become your wife. I felt my walls began to break down; still, I remained adamant upon my anger and feelings of betrayal.
Some time ago, you came to me and told me that you would be a father. With a hateful smirk I began to think horrid things that, to this day, I am still very, very ashamed of. But then there was Emma. I saw that sweet little smile and the bigger one you toted when she gazed up at you in admiration. And then you came to work for Mom, and we spoke more and more often. I came to the realization that without having known you much during my growing up, I had become eerily like you.
And then was yesterday. I watched an old home movie of us down at the Port of Oquwaka. How you chased after me, tucked my shirt in, buttoned my loose overall and even tied my shoes. How you laughed when I did goofy things common to a child of my age group. And I realized my own grin of admiration at that age much mirrored Emma's--and that smile you returned mirrored the one you flash at that little girl today.
David, There is absolutely zero doubt in my mind that you will be an amazing father. It took us such a long time to be brother and sister, but on this day (just any old normal Monday) I am happy we took the path we did. I have a unique relationship with you that I do not share with anyone else in this family. It is a bond of love and respect, as I realize how hard this bond was to build, and how much harder it will be to break. You have been one of my worst enemies, and now you are one of my best friends. The admiration I feel for you in my heart has become so much more than it did that day down by the river when I was two.
I love you, and I hope for you, Justina, and Emma the very best. I will always be there to celebrate at your side.
Much love, Your sister.
What is it all about?
WELL, since you ASKED...
This blog is about me. Well, not really me, more the stuff around me. Finding myself sans children, I have time during my day that I want to begin to devote to writing. THANK YOU M'DEAR, NIKKI ROY, FOR HELPING ME FIND THIS PAGE!
A little bit about MOI...
I am the youngest of five children, hence the title of this blog "The Littlest One." I have four older brothers (David McDorman, John "JJ" Roy, Daniel "Danny" McDorman, and Travis Woolums.) While parts of my family aren't fully family (or biological family at all!) they are still family to me.
I am nineteen (twenty on December 8th) and I'm currently a private home care CNA. I have two wonderful dogs named Lucy and Gracie, and a lazy cat, named Max.
This is gonna be fun.
This blog is about me. Well, not really me, more the stuff around me. Finding myself sans children, I have time during my day that I want to begin to devote to writing. THANK YOU M'DEAR, NIKKI ROY, FOR HELPING ME FIND THIS PAGE!
A little bit about MOI...
I am the youngest of five children, hence the title of this blog "The Littlest One." I have four older brothers (David McDorman, John "JJ" Roy, Daniel "Danny" McDorman, and Travis Woolums.) While parts of my family aren't fully family (or biological family at all!) they are still family to me.
I am nineteen (twenty on December 8th) and I'm currently a private home care CNA. I have two wonderful dogs named Lucy and Gracie, and a lazy cat, named Max.
This is gonna be fun.
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